This Means War-Drama Skit

This Means War-Drama Skit

Themes: Black History; Civil War; roles of soldiers in the Civil War; roles of women in the Civil War; conditions for African Americans during the Civil War
Categories: Black History 
Summary:

Teenagers Ike and Jetta are forced to spend some time in a Civil War museum because their parents feel they need to experience more history.  Little did they know, they would soon be experiencing it in a most unusual way, when the statues in the room come to life! Soon, Civil War soldiers and spies are sharing their "war" stories and Ike and Jetta find out what it was really like to be an African American soldier back in the 1800's.  Stories include those of: Robert Smalls (captain of the steamer ship, the Planter, who escaped to help the Union; Andre Cailloux, the 1st African American war hero who helped change the views of black soldiers; William Carney, who despite being shot 4 times, would not let the American flag fall during battle; Cathy Williams, the first documented African American woman soldier; C-Fed, a conglomeration of all the African American soldiers who fought for the Confederacy; and Harriet Tubman and Mary Elizabeth Bowser, who were spies for the Union.

 
 
Style: Comedy/Drama

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Characters: 9 (5 Male, 4 Female)
Length: 10-12 minutes
 
Excerpt (Sample)

This Means War

Setting: A museum. 

With the exception of Jetta and Ike, the other characters stand on stage as "posed" statues, remaining motionless. Standing stage left are: Smalls, Andre, and Carney.  They should be dressed in navy blue to resemble military men.  Carney holds an American flag in his hands. C-Fed is also stage left but is dressed in gray to resemble a military man.  A sizeable gap should be left in the center of the stage, then standing stage right is C.W., who is a woman dressed as a man in a blue military uniform. She should wear a manly wig and perhaps some kind of soldier's hat.  Standing next to C.W. dressed as simple house servants are: Harriet and Mary. 

 

As the scene opens, Ike and Jetta (teen brother and sister), enter. 

Ike:

(to Jetta) I can't believe we have to spend time in this stupid museum. And on a Saturday.  It's so unfair!

Jetta:

I know.  

Ike:

(looking around) What's the name of this place again?

Jetta:

(sits down on the floor) I don't know.  The sign said something about the Civil War.

Ike:

Great, just what I want on the weekend-more education.

Jetta:

Mom and Dad thought it would be good for us to experience history for a change instead of just reading about it.   

Ike:

But this is so boring!  It's just a bunch of musty old statues. 

Jetta:

The whole place is like that.  It's a bunch of artifacts and stuff, with information on the wall plaques. 

Ike:

How is that any different than what we learn in school? How is this experiencing history?

Jetta:

What are you asking me for?  I don't want to be here any more than you do. 

Ike:

'Cause you're the only one here.  Or haven't you noticed? 

Jetta:

I noticed.  I haven't seen anyone else since we got here.  If it wasn't for us and the  lady at the information desk, this place would be deserted.

Ike:

That's because it's snoozeville! (makes snoring noises) What a waste of a perfectly good Saturday.  I should be home playing X-Box. 

Jetta:

And I should be at the mall hanging out with Marcus but there's nothing we can do except wait for Dad to pick us up. 

Ike:

What are we supposed to do until then?

Jetta:

(getting annoyed) I don't know.  Personally, I plan to sit here and take a nap. (she lays down and closes her eyes)

Ike walks over to the statues and looks around.  He reads an imaginary wall plaque next to C.W.

Ike:

Hey, the museum got this plaque wrong.  It says here this guy is a woman. 

Jetta:

I'm thrilled.  Now, leave me alone.

Ike:

Come here and see if all the other ones are right.

Jetta:

Why?

Ike:

Because it's something to do.  Come over here.

Jetta:

(getting up, goes to the statues and looks around) The others seem right to me.

Ike:

(noticing the flag) Jetta, do you still know how to do those flag corps routines you learned?

Jetta:

Yeah.  Why?

Ike:

How about teaching me?

Jetta gives him a "dirty" look

Ike:

It's something to do.  Just grab that flag and bring it over here.

Jetta:

Fine. (she starts to grab Carney's flag, not looking at his face)

Carney:

(moving only his mouth-his face and body stay "frozen") I wouldn't do that if I were you.

Jetta:

(stops, looks at Ike) Why not? You just told me to grab it.

Ike:

(looks up, a bit freaked out) I didn't say anything, Jetta.

Jetta:

Yes, you did.  You told me to grab the flag and then when I started to, you told me not to.

Ike:

(shakes his head "no" in a scared fashion) I told you to grab the flag. And that's it

Jetta:

Yeah, right.  I heard you, Ike.  (turns back to Carney and starts to remove the flag again)

Carney:

I said, (this time Carney moves, bending his face so it is right in front of Jetta's) I wouldn't do that if I were you. 

Jetta jumps back and screams

Jetta:

(stammering) The....the...statues can...t..t...talk!

Ike:

(looking at Carney) That's impossible!

Harriet:

(moves and puts her hand on Ike's shoulder) That's what everyone says!

Ike also jumps back and screams

Ike:

Let's get out of here! (starts to leave)

Jetta:

Right behind you! (follows Ike)

Andre:

(quickly grabs Ike) I'm afraid we can't let you do that. 

Smalls, Carney and C-Fed all stand in front of Ike, while C.W., Harriet and Mary move to stand behind Jetta, blocking them in

C-Fed:

Especially after the way you've insulted us.  "Must old statues," indeed.

Jetta:

Insulted you?  But you're statues-how can you be alive?

Ike:

Yeah, what is this, Night at the Museum

Mary:

I told you those guys stole that movie idea from us!

Smalls:

Except the Civil War museum wasn't good enough for them.  No sir; they had to go and make it about the Smithsonian and the Museum of Natural History.  I'm tellin' ya, we ought to sue the pants off them!

Carney:

(stepping down) All right, let's not get started on that whole ordeal again.  (to Ike and Jetta) The point here my friends, is that you need to be taught a lesson.

Jetta:

(scared, stammering) W..w..what kind of lesson?

Ike:

(scared) What are you going to do to us?

C.W.

What obviously should have been done a long time ago. 

Ike:

(falling down on his knees in front of C.W., begging) Please don't hurt me!  Please, please!

C.W.:

(to Carney) This is pathetic. 

Carney:

(to Ike) Get up, son.

Ike:

(gets up slowly) Please, don't hit me in the face!  I've got a date with Keisha this weekend and I'd like to have all my teeth! (shields his face as he groans and whines)

Andre:

Would someone please tell me, what is this fool's problem?

Jetta:

My brother and I are just trying to figure out what's going on here, Sir. 

Carney:

As I was saying, you both need to be taught a lesson. 

Ike starts cowering and whining again

Carney:

A history lesson.

Ike:

(gets back to normal immediately) Say what?

Carney:

A history lesson.

Harriet:

Whenever anyone enters the museum with an attitude like yours, we tend to spring to life.  It's really rather remarkable. 

Ike:

(relaxing) Sure, I knew that all the time.  I was just playin' with ya.  So, who are guys.....

Mary loudly clears her throat

Ike:

...and ladies, supposed to be?

Smalls:

Didn't you read anything in the museum?

C-Fed:

No.  That's why we're here, remember?

Smalls:

Oh, right.  (to Ike and Jetta) The room you're standing in is a tribute to the African American soldiers who fought in the Civil War and the many others who made significant contributions to the war effort.