Would You Be Mine-Drama Skit

Would You Be Mine-Drama Skit

Themes: Marriage, relationships, compromise
Categories: Love & Marriage, Valentine's Day, Christian Living 

This skit is written in rhyme.  It opens with the male lead admiring the female lead, and asking her "What would it take for you to be mine?"  She pulls out a long list of "musts" like shopping and frolicking through meadows, helping with dishes etc. of which he thinks is both unreasonable and ridiculous. He then responds with his own "must" list, like going hunting, belching and watching football. She, in turn, will have none of it, to which the couple faces a "stale mate."  How will this couple resolve their differences and live in harmony with one another?  Or is it even possible?  One special book may just have the answers they are looking for.

Style: Comedy

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Characters: 2 (1 Male, 1 Female)
Length: 8-10 minutes
Excerpt (Sample)

Setting: A woman is standing, as a man walks by. He is obviously impressed with her and walks up to her and initiates conversation. 

Him:  Stop the presses! You're simply divine!

            What would it take for you to be mine? 

Her: (Eyebrows raised in mock fashion, she grins, then whips out a 'scroll. type of list and begins reading, over-dramatic and gushy) 

        You must shop with me from mall to mall.    

        And bring me flowers for no reason at all. 

        You must frolic through meadows in your hairy bare feet,

        And help me catch butterflies. I think that would be neat. 

        You must watch romantic movies that make us sniffle and cry.

        And always be honest with me, share your feelings, and never lie. 

        You must help me with laundry, and washing the dishes.

        And you'd pick up after yourself. That's what my fondest wish is. 

        My mother must visit for more than a week.

        And you'd behave yourself, and not act like a geek! 

        You must stop to ask for directions, if you ever get lost,      

        And not drive around in circles trying to prove you're the Big Boss. 

        You would massage my neck until there's no more stress.    

        And draw me a bubble bath without making a mess. 

        So, what do you think, are you up the challenge?

        Can you be mine? Do you think you can manage? 

Him: (Sarcastically. Small actions can be made up to do each verse, if desired) 

        You've got be kidding, please tell me you're joking

        Upon hearing that list, I find that I'm choking. (grabs throat and gasps) 

        I won't be caught shopping from mall to mall,

        And, are you serious, flowers for no reason at all? 

        Frolicking through the meadow is definitely out!

        It's obvious you have no clue what us men are about.   

        Sharing my feelings, and movies that make me cry?

        (Shaking his head) I don't think so, I'd rather die! 

        Does your mother have to stay for more than one week?

        I can't take that cheap perfume--you know how she reeks! 

        I'll never ask directions, no matter how long the journey takes,

        Ten minutes, an hour, what difference does it make? 

        Neck rubs and bubble baths, now that's the final straw!

        You women are the weirdest creatures I ever saw! 

        If that's what it takes to make you my "lass"

        Then there's only one solution: I think I'll pass. 

Her: You're rude and you're crude.  Why, you're not worthy of me.

        But still, I must know, what would it take to be yours? Just of curiosity. 

Him: I'm happy you asked, I'll be glad to report.

        The kind of woman with whom I would consort. 

(Takes out his own scroll from back pocket and reads) 

        To be mine, you'd have to crank up the POWER ooh, ooh, ooh!

        (Tim Allen Style)

        And not complain when I don't take a shower.